Floridian Test

You know you're a Floridian if....

Socks are only for bowling..
You don't use an umbrella because you know the rain will be over in five minutes...
A good parking place has nothing to do with distance from the store, but everything to do with shade...
Your winter coat is made of denim...
You can tell the difference between fire ant bites and mosquito bites...
Anything under 70 degrees is chilly...
You've driven through Yeehaw Junction...
You know that no other grocery store can compare to Publix...
Every other house in your neighborhood had blue roofs in 2004-2005...
You are on a first name basis with the Hurricane list. They aren't Hurricane Charley or Hurricane Frances. You know them as Andrew, Charley , Frances , Ivan and Jeanne...
You know what a snowbird is and when they'll leave...
You think a six-foot alligator is actually pretty average...
Flip-flops are everyday wear. Shoes are for business meetings...
You have a drawer full of bathing suits, and one sweatshirt..
A mountain is any hill 100 feet above sea level...
You know the four seasons really are: hurricane season, lobster season, tourist season and summer...
You've hosted a hurricane party...
You can pronounce Okeechobee, Kissimmee , Withlacoochee and Micanopy...
You understand why it's better to have a friend with a boat, than have a boat yourself...
You've worn shorts and used the A/C on Christmas and New Years...
You recognize Dade as ' Northern Cuba ' ...

You not only forward this but you understand it!

I don't normally post stuff like this but the exception makes the rule, and this list, slightly edited to reflect my truths about being a Floridian, made me laugh. Also this post won't substitute for my usual photo essay in this spot. This is an optional extra.

Hogfish

Stock Island is going to be redeveloped, the land is bought, the plans are laid, the permissions sought. We wait with bated breath to see what condo monstrosities will rise like mushrooms across what is now a working person's island. Hogfish is firmly ensconced in that tradition, an open air bar and restaurant on the waterfront:This is a quiet corner of Safe Harbor, sure they play music, melodic 60's and 70's when I was there on Sunday, but this isn't the place to get rowdy or rude. If you need air conditioning the spritzer cooling system may not work for you:Reviewing the quality of food in Keys restaurants is a tricky business, cooks come and go, sometimes they have bad days, other days they show up drunk, and all the minutiae of their daily lives tends to get plated with the food. I've had badly cooked fish at Hogfish (once) but the fish fingers I had Sunday were divine, as they normally are, soft white flesh inside, crisp steaming battered outside. And the iced tea wasn't bad at all, I drank enough heaven knows, and here in proper southern style they offer it sweetened as well.The staff were friendly and cheerful keeping my glass filled but leaving me in peace to read and eat, which is exactly how I like it. The totally outside tables dockside I prefer in the winter but some hardy souls were perspiring under the umbrellas:There is a daily menu plus a list of printed items as well, hamburgers and chicken and stuff like that all jumbled up with the various catches of the day:If you are feeling more jocular you will appreciate the welcome sign nailed among the bric-a-brac:All of which would be enough to recommend Hogfish to friends, though finding this place is a little tricky. Riding down the main drag on Stock Island from Highway One you will reach a West Marine Store on the right (reverse direction in this picture, for my convenience):Follow the little white signs on 4th Avenue andthey will tell you to turn left on Front Street and after half a mile there you are, a last little piece of old Stock Island. And if the restaurant weren't enough, there's more to this place than just somewhere to eat drink and listen to music. There is a private little world here.Try and guess if this inhabitant is a local or a visitor:If you guessed local you'd be right; he's given away by his lack of clothing and in particular his lack of interest in name brand clothing. If he's a visitor he's doing a fine job of imitation. His neighbors live alongside in boats either commercial or recreational, though around here recreational means "affordable home afloat":Not everyone lives in a small floating space, gentrification is nipping at Safe Harbor's heels:A nice house is nothing compared to what's in the works. In a previous essay on Stock island I mentioned the new marina planned for the other side of the harbor and developers are trying to get a hotel approved without submitting it to rigorous state mandated building restrictions. They say it will be useful as a storm refuge for essential personnel. The state is not impressed by the reasoning but something big this way comes. Money talks, and we hope Hogfish and its surrounding community can hold on.

It's not fancy, but the people who live here and keep art studios and craft shops along the dock live lives worth preserving in my opinion. The docks are clean and tidy and well maintained:The residents know how to make a place homely and they've even built a a little plaza to hang out in:The sheds are used to fabricate and create because this is a community of independent thinkers and creators. I met one resident getting off her boat and she was restraining her very elderly guard dog, who though barely able to stand was determined I shouldn't interfere with their home. Faithful to the end he looked at me through rheumy eyes, his hind legs barely able to support his thin old frame and I wanted to hug him, but I don't think it would have done his self respect any good. He is still a guard dog, still breathing thus still on duty.

It takes long time residence to create this sort of ambiance in a marina, and its not how they want the new/old Kings Pointe or Key West Harbor marinas to look. They prefer sterile order, I prefer this:

I had to go to work as I had signed up for some overtime to cover for a sick colleague, so I tootled off on my Bonneville (Argh! I FORGOT to photograph it. I'm losing my mind) and went to do my bit for police communications. I got off at midnight and decided I needed to savor the peace and tranquility of safe harbor in the middle of the night.Ah yes, Hogfish, what a good idea it was to remind me to pay a visit.