Zero Night

I attended a retirement party this week. It took me a few moments to realize that there were no masks, just a bunch of vaccinated middle aged people hanging around the pool. We are starting life again. How odd.

Gary asked me to post a picture of him on the blog so I chose this one of him swimming in the canal, as the pool wasn't large enough to contain his saltwater ambitions. When you are from Tennessee and you are Garythetourist a trip to Key West doesn't count unless you immerse yourself in Mother Ocean. 

His wife shrugged philosophically as he took off on the paddleboard frantically jabbing the water to find unexplored vistas of open water. Another wife joined in the shrugging pointing out sometimes you have to let your husbands be idiots so they get it out of their systems. That seemed a positive note for my retirement plans… He came back in the fullness of time none the worst for wear. I was still pondering the new/old normal. I quite liked being normal for a evening. 

The pandemic has undoubtedly had some positive spin offs, assuming you weren't one of the nearly 600,000 dead, and millions more made sick or bankrupted or unemployed. Oh and the mental health deterioration suffered by so many in lockdown. 

There was that pandemic period of time by contrast when you could eat on the sidewalk in Key West. Compared to the wreckage economic and human it wasn't much of a compensation for the damned virus but it was nice for people who craved eating at a restaurant to be able to get outdoor table service.

Inasmuch as the virus is in retreat in the US, so is sidewalk dining in Key West. I am not a huge fan of sharing my food with the flies but after a lifetime living around people who like to eat alfresco I submit to the will of the majority and sit outside when asked. I picnic with the best of the them, I sweat over my food like a champion.  I tell you: I love to eat outdoors (lying through gritted teeth).

Oddly enough this isn't about me and my peculiar flair for nonsensical nonconformity, because tons of people love to eat outside, so much so the City of Key West has now returned to its pre-pandemic stance and is working to making it unviable. A story in the Keys Weekly is pointing out the absurdly high fees charged by the city to allow sidewalk seating. So high most places can't make a go of it.

Key West is the ideal town for outdoor seating so the city is now going to charge five hundred dollars per sidewalk seat. That's a lot of pizzas and sandwiches to sell just to pay for the seat. The paper in its very thorough report checks other cities' policies and none of them come close to charging five hundred bucks. Many of them demand nothing more than insurance coverage, a no cost paperwork modification apparently.

So I shall ask myself out loud: why? Does no one in charge know the fable of the death of the goose that laid the golden egg?

Beside the fee structure the pleasure people get from eating their food where it is best exposed to microbes and dust and personal discomfort is hard to assess. 

This fee problem reminds me of those irritating "No U-Turn" signs scattered around municipalities. Why, I ask myself do they say no U-turn? Because people want to make a U-turn here, that's why!

It was nice while it lasted, seeing people eat outdoors as they preferred. Not any more. This is a return to normal that makes no sense to me.

The crucial paragraphs that explain the dilemma clearly to me:

“A total of two applications were approved and paid for, the first was Bill Lay of La Trattoria, and the second was Cafe Marquesa,” Anderson said. “I am an owner of Amigos, and at that time I looked at the program and determined it was too expensive. We chose not to participate, as did every single other restaurant on the island except for the above two.

“There were many reasons we thought the fees were too high,” Anderson said, explaining that, “additional sidewalk seats only generate extra revenue for a restaurant when 100% of the interior seats are occupied. If only 75% of seats are full, and a table chooses to sit outside, the restaurant is not generating any additional revenue, but merely shifting occupancy from interior to exterior.”

In addition, Anderson said, outside seats are not as valuable as interior seats because they’re not as desirable when it’s too hot, too windy, raining (or threatening to rain).

“Restaurants with higher ticket averages, such as La Trattoria and Cafe Marquesa, can more easily absorb annual costs. Low-ticket restaurants, such as pizza parlors, taco shops and others are at a disadvantage,” he said, adding that the program includes numerous other unknowns that make such a large investment risky, especially following the pandemic year.

How much more rational than that can the explanation be for opposing the fees? Only in Key West, the best known frost-free city in North America does outdoor dining not exist. That is way weirder than going to a mask-free pool party, and that felt weird enough. 

Duval And Front

Tourism in the Keys, what a thing of beauty! I enjoy history and I recommend taking the 90 minute Conch Train tour to get a condensed view of the history of this town, and there is a bit of history as the town  is approaching the 200 year mark.

Sloppy Joe's is where everyone goes for bar food, music, drinks and t-shirts which give visitors the right to say they were there. It's not my kind of place but Key West would have gone bankrupt a long time ago paying attention to my whims.

Souvenir stalls are everywhere selling what the English call tat but which I find very useful as little thank you gifts when I travel. A tatse of the Conch Republic...

Mallory Square is in the news as the city commission is gearing up to rebuild the ship dock off the square. It's designed to accommodate smaller cruise ships and it won't be enlarged because there isn't room. But it will be opened to the public after it's done.

I like that idea. the current pier is fenced off as it is considered a hazard when ships aren't docked there. The new will allow people, even I dare say people with cameras, to step on the new dock. I might have to come back to check it out...

I was interested in the buildings that were decomposing and are now being rebuilt on the southern side of Mallory Square.  What the shirtless man was doing I couldn't say. He seemed harmless which is as mush as you can ask these days.

I checked out a group of people limin' in a most unAmerican way., more like European villagers if you ask me. I found them quite charming, a reminder to slow down. So I kept walking of course.

The Mallory Square observer. I wonder if she enjoyed watching the space as much as I did on my lunch break?

The city commission is apparently finding enlightenment on the sore subject of electric bikes. The newspaper says the city will allow electric bikes to travel as pedal bikes. In a town overwhelmed with cars helping alternatives to flourish seems sensible to me. There are always the detractors who complain about some poor riding techniques and doubtless the debate will continue long past my departure. And no we aren't hauling bicycles, kayaks or paraphernalia of similar sorts around with us on our van. We shall rent locally as the mood strikes us.

I am surprised how strong the scooter market remains in Key West. I would have thought electric bikes would be popular but I suspect someone needs to create a strong simple durable electric bike at a bargain price to break into the rental market. 

Summer is here, bright lights, strong shadows and lots of people. The virus is fast becoming a  memory, an unpleasant one at that.

Night Colors

Driving thirty minutes into town to walk Rusty after he woke me up I was listening to a photography podcast. It was a discussion about the debate between color and  black and white and while I found it interesting I was not aware that I had been immediately affected by it. 

By the time I had walked from Caroline Street to Conch Republic Seafood I understood that I had internalized at least some of the discussion! I noticed a whole lot of color leaping out me in the dark. A city office on the docks painted the classic sky blue.

You'll see that color painted under a lot overhanging out door roofs. It is said the light blue color discourages bugs from settling. I have no idea if it's true but it looks pleasant enough.

The joke in Florida goes something like this: how do you recognize a newcomer in the supermarket? That's the person looking self conscious when they buy cockroach poison. After a while alligators and palmetto bugs( the tourist brochure term for roaches) are a fact of life.

It used to be the Key West Bight was full of commercial fishing boats. Now there's one holdout among the pleasure craft in the "Historic Seaport" and its attached to Conch Republic Seafood, a popular tourist haunt.

I've seen these charter boats below lined up but the green one on the end was new. So I thought it fit the theme that was developing my head, chasing colors.

Colors are everywhere when you look. I used to wonder about this weird mood lighting and then my wife got some installed in the van. I think it makes the cabin look like a darkroom but she likes it and wouldn't you now it there's an app to control the exact color too..

Wahlburger is a new restaurant on the waterfront where White Tarpon used to be before they moved to the Boathouse which is now at Turtle Kraals in the sort of musical chairs that often happens around here.  I've had their food and it was  fine which opinion seems to be seconded on Tripadvisor. 

The odd thing to me is how actors who have had perfectly satisfactory careers with all fame and wealth accorded them want to get going on all these weird unrelated business ventures. Still I suppose it keeps family members employed and proves something to some one who needs affirmation but I know I wouldn't bother, as I've heard running a  restaurant is a high stress business. Still, there it is, a eat a burger here and rub shoulders at some considerable distance with Fame the all important ingredient in the world.

The other place that did that was the Rum Barrell owned by a doctor to the sports world who spent his fortune playing pirate themed restaurants in Key West. Then apparently he found it more satisfactory in St Augustine so he decamped forthwith and left some gaps in the restaurant scene which are being filled now the pandemic seems to be over. For now. Maybe. 

And as I ambled down Greene Street pas the moment of colors I saw Peppers of Key West has closed and become a coffee shop. I liked that place and my wife loved it as she likes spicy food. The virus seems to have a lot to answer for.

Streets Of Key West

I asked to make his picture and I said you look happy. "I am happy" he replied so I didn't bother to ask him his name. Enough said. 

Happy was on Fitzpatrick Street behind Rick's where other people were working on attaining his state of happiness.

And more happiness seekers at the tree bar next door. The usual light crowds on Duval Street on a warm Spring afternoon.

Everywhere has reopened and though a  few "masks must be worn signs" are in evidence on some businesses I saw a couple of people wearing face coverings.

The Bull:

I don't wear  a mask in public unless the sign on the door of the business asks me to. Maria Luisa Paparini did not raise her son to be impolite to people earning a living.

Daniel Linehan noted around town for his Sharpie Van all etched in ink by hand by the man.  He seems to have run out of space and was drawing lines on paper.

The Bull from the outside:

Long Live The Conch Republic: a state of mind.

All Hail The Goliath Grouper:

He was tossing vaguely unsuccessfully a coin in the grouper's mouth. All mild good fun in Key West of an afternoon.

Mangroves At Dusk

A walk in the mangroves, a picture of mud. Sounds about right.

Sunday silence.

The east wind persists as it often does this time of year.

A cooling breeze helps keep mosquitoes at bay. Good for me.

Red mangrove roots. 

Things that catch my eye as I trail after Rusty. Dragonflies in the distance.

Summer clouds.

Peace and quiet.