I feel stuck in a rut at the moment and I don't know quite how to get out of it. A fellow I met on the road many years ago remarked that he expected me to run out of words sooner or later. Bob Leong was one of the nicest people you could hop[e to meet on the Internet and made friends all over the place. I thought he was wrong and I told him so at the time.
Aside from riding motorcycles Bob was an avid Corvette owner in his corner of far Western Canada and on a trip to the heart of Corvette-land in Kentucky, you might call it a pilgrimage, he died in his sleep in distant 2014. As sudden and as unexpected as it was, his death caused all of us that knew and liked him to sit back a second and think. I remembered his words and even after he was no longer around to debate with, I continued to disagree. Now I wish he were here to help me unravel this conundrum that he had predicted: some day you will use up all your words.
I'm not sure if I've squeezed Key West dry and thus am ready to see something new, or if, as I believe more likely I am ready to see something new and thus am failing to see Key West in a fresh new light each day. It is a conundrum. Thinking about it put me in mind of the wisdom of the late Bob Cheong.
The every day beauty is here, but my ability to capture the essence of daily life here is slipping through my fingers. I cannot believe reading about the tightening noose of lack of economic sense in this community makes for interesting reading. I am constrained from writing about my difficulties at work where we have 15 budgeted positions and only eight of them are filled. Going to work constantly short staffed is wearing me down, I admit it.
Normally the rush of people this time of year slows down and for a couple of months before family summer vacations we see a period of quiet, of refreshment after the winter crowds. This year as usual Covid has changed all that and the pent up desire to travel and be away means Key West hotels are full and some of the money lost during the height of the pandemic is being made up.
I am told the city itself has done okay during this time of stress, with cautious budgeting and planning for the worst, so the city according to our union negotiators is not in bad financial shape. Good news I suppose for people looking at a long term job situation. But Key West as I frequently point out has an astonishing capacity for reinventing itself and surviving.
I keep walking Rusty, taking pictures, seeking new angles or shapes or perspectives, different light, sticking with an awkward lense to force myself to see and not take things I've seen for twenty years for granted. I want new horizons and different challenges and ther thought of learning to see on the fly, as we drive by makes me nervous. I know what to expect in the Keys, rainy season or dry, morning noon or evening or night.
Places I love, the origami tree shadows against the colors of the setting sun, the clouds of summer, the shadows of noon with the sun overhead, the irritating sweat of summer walks fogging the camera and my glasses and my mind. It's what I know. It's safe.
Time for a change, time to risk making a mistake, time to see new things and new places and put my view of them on this same page. My wife is wrapping up her last school year, her last class is taught, she has some papers to shuffle and graduations to attend but he career as a teacher is over. Next week she starts her new and important job of Chief Planning Officer for the Alaska to Argentina expedition of 2022. Rusty the Chief Security Officer has been practicing sleeping in the van under the air conditioner these hot summer days so he is transitioning nicely. I am still showing up at my desk holding to the routine. It seems unfair but my wife says she started working before me all those years ago.
This time next year I hope to be in Alberta, or the Yukon perhaps, depending on the snowline. Bob Leong country, as it were. I wonder what I shall be seeing. This page will still be here, I've added a url to it already, thegoldenvan.com but it simply forwards along with Key West Diary to this same page: conchscooter.blogspot. A different photograph, a new tag, the more things change the more they will stay the same. I hope new words will come with new environments and I hope my camera will reveal them to my eye.
11 comments:
Your words aren't gone- I'm convinced they just moved to photographs. If you're unhappy with what the photos are telling you it's simply that you haven't learned yet how to let them speak for you.
I suspect you will never run out of words as long as you have the desire to stroll around the island with your camera in your hand, your dog at your side, and your wonder of all things compelling your fingers to click a lens shutter ...and then later a mouse.
I think you will realize, if you take some time to muse on the subject, that your familiarity with the island has allowed you the unique opportunity to see it through both a telescope and a microscope, examining its life on so many levels, and sharing that wonder of discovery with a vast unseen, yet very appreciative audience. We would not have known all these intriguing levels of this small island without your ever curious mind finding such visual and verbal treasures. In the short time that I had accidentally stumbled upon your blog, and stayed to enjoy your ramblings both physical and mental, of an island that I thought I knew well several years ago, I have always been entertained by your descriptive palate of words I could often touch up with the colors of my own vivid memories. Streets, houses, people, bikes, and the island life came alive again thanks to your words. Words that have flowed for years and years, set in motion by your own unwavering curosity of a small island.
I think what you will actually find, once you set off on your journey to find new vistas and new experiences, is that you will leave behind the unique microscope you've developed to see the unusual in the normal. Living so long in Key West has allowed you to separate the normal from the unusual, which will not be something you will be able to do in a new place where the normal is unknown.
I hope I'm making sense since this isn't a part of "seeing life" for the average Joe-on-the-street. They rarely look close enough to discern more than one or two levels of what exists around them, and the vast majority would be hard pressed to take an interesting picture, complete with an interestingly written internal dialog, on a daily basis with the ease in which you do so.
I can only thank you for letting me revisit Key West over and over again, every day, through your lens and thoughts. Frankly, I think you still have quite a few words quietly awaiting their turn on the page. Delightful, thoughtful colorful frames for each picture you share.
I might be the only one to be sad when you leave Key West.
Michael, words will never fail you, wherever you are. Your Key West diaries are an important lengthy record of contemporary life there and should be archived for future historians. Are you planning to do that?
Best wishes, Bill in London
You didnt run out of words, just experiences. That will change soon im sure. Same here.I am in a rut also. Need new places to see to charge my depleted battery. It didnt help that we cancelled our trip. Because of the pipeline gas shortage along east coast. The Wife didnt want to roast our weenies along the side of RT 95 after we ran out of gas. Lack of gas turns that mighty Hemi into Hemiroids. Lol. New trip in July though. Future endeavors for all of us chomping at the Covid bit will pull us out of our ruts!
Not to worry, words will come.
Michael
As follower of your blog for many years I look forward to reading and seeing your family's future van Adventures! Also as you and Layne feel safer in venturing out to eat in the Key's please continue to share your dining experiences :)
I am so sorry that you have become a "gate keeper" on how we respond to your blog with COMMENT MODERATION in larger font size!
Like all things, your are also realizing that "Either you get tired of "it" or it gets tired of you.
I trust this (my) posting will be like writing on public bathroom walls. No one cares or much pays attention and looking for a helping hand from your readers is a cry for help. You get what your give, Sir.
No, you will not run out of words my friend, I know you better than that. You observe and you comment and we prosper. I “second” everything Flora said! I’ll share a few thoughts, quotes that came to mind as I read this blog post:
I hate to quote JB to a “local” but here goes: “With no plans for the future, he still seems in control, from a broncho ride to a ten-foot tide, he just had to learn to roll, roll with the punches, play all of his hunches, make the best of whatever came his way. What he lacked in ambition, he made up with intuition, plowing straight ahead come what may.”
From the “Airstream Song”: “Unbridled, or tethered and tied, the safety of the fence, or the danger of the ride, I’ll always be unsatisfied. Unanchored in a store, or safety on the shore, if this is all I need, why do I want more?”
And from a very old blog post from the SV Delos blog: “The more I began to think, the more I realized that I had always let my current goal define myself. I had lost track of who I was outside of the professional world that surrounded me day in and day out. In reality, I had never slowed down to smell the roses-to see who I was when my nose wasn’t to the grind stone. I now value spontaneity over schedule and experience over achievement.”
So go my dear tethered, tied, anchored, fenced friend who is rich with intuition. Go! Live and enjoy the spontaneity and we will all look forward to living the experiences with you as we read along. Cheers!
Each day is a Present. Seems this post is exceptional, because it is today's. Thank you for taking us on your journey.
I'm looking forward to trailing around with you. I have to admit I will miss seeing Key West from your eyes but those other places are interesting too. I never imagined living where I am now but it's working out (for 12 years!). I'm sure you will have adventures both good and bad and all us readers are looking forward to hearing about them. Take care!
Well there is a lot to think about there and I shall. I fear that I am become boring but apparently not so I shall keep on with one eye on the change and one eye on the present and the third eye looking back.
I have time to, As Flora puts it, see in Key West the details others miss.
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