Screw Up

It started out pretty good. 

We camped at an Eco Park where you can sleep or just come for the day and play in the river or the swimming pools. Bring a picnic or eat at the restaurant and have a lovely day.

It was lovely and cool overnight, cold almost, so we slept well and awoke to a glorious dawn. 

We exercised and showered and got on the road. The city of Coban was an hour away and home to our first laundry since Mexico. We needed it. 

Come back at five they said and we paid five bucks for a big bag. Lovely. Off we went to look for a coffee plantation where we could get a decent cup. 

We skipped the tour and got an explanation of coffee roasting with a nice cup and a slice of coffee cake. The perfect pick me up. 

There are 480 members in the coop according to Laura, and she works here each weekend as a break from her law school studies. Her father is a lawyer in Coban and she has the opportunity to become a professional so she’s got her path in life sorted out. 

She speaks English but is learning French as they get more French visitors here than Americans. They have a spot to camp but we had other plans. 

Guatemalans drive like maniacs, fast reckless undisciplined and always pushing. Guatemalan roads are narrow with no pull outs, even in villages, and there are tons of pedestrians and cyclists in this poor country. The result is fearsome traffic patterns and much more intense than Mexico where drivers are generally more laid back, believe it or not. I miss Mexico! 

Google Maps sent us by way of dirt backroads to the Orchid Preserve:

Hidden up a dirt track off the main road with camping also on offer. 

A lovely shaded spot where it all went wrong.

There are hundreds of orchids in Guatemala, at risk from deforestation and exploitation for sale. 

Forty years ago a Guatemalan got a burr up his butt about orchids and set out to save them. He has died but his sons and grandson continue the good work. 

The Belize orchid. I thought you might like that: 

Parrot orchid, about the size of a joint on your finger. 

Well behaved dogs on leash (“correa”) welcome. Rusty fit the bill even though he was impatient to walk which made photography a challenge. 

The White Nun (“Mona Blanca”) is the national flower of Guatemala and only grows here in awkward distant trees… 

Shirley our guide, not a fan of photography, one of life’s bright sparks. Great fun to walk with. 

Her colleague Lisa and her astonishing artwork. 

I really enjoyed the place. 

Until we drove down the hill to the lovely serene campsite, basically a driveway next to a lawn.

Then we had to exit to collect our laundry. We got stuck on the steep hill. It was surprising but what we hadn’t taken into account was the loose gravel and dirt that undid us. I hooked the winch and slowly pulled us up. Great! 

Except we shredded our front tires. 30,000 miles old and with equal mileage to go our Agilis front tires were done, suddenly and irremediably at 3:30 on a Saturday afternoon.

Layne still had her dental appointment in Guatemala City at 1:30 pm Monday. Oh shit was the thought that went through my mind. 

The first thing we did was be glad no one was hurt. A couple of employees from the Orchid Reserve lent a hand but refused a tip. We were in Belize no longer where bystanders asked for money at random. Then we called a cab as we still needed to collect our laundry even though we were apparently stuck here for the weekend. Jose our knowledgeable cab driver had other ideas and took me for a drive straight to the Dunlop shop. 

They had two tires of the right size and could install them right now. There was only one problem…I held my breath…shit…they are made in Japan and not China so they are expensive. Two thousand quetzals for two tires mounted and balanced. $270? No problem! Jose drove me back to pick up GANNET2. It was a horrible drive with rubber strips flapping and the fear of a blow out. But this is Guatemala so no problem, everyone drives on bald tires! 

Unbelievable but within the hour we had two brand new all terrain tires installed. We probably do need knobbies on the front drive tires, especially considering the places we go. 

Bound to be a bit noisier and probably won’t last as long as our beloved Michelin Agilis but we are on the road per schedule. And the next time we have to scramble up a dirt hill we’ll have more traction…Result! 

And yes I know in the US you don’t mix tires. We’ll see how it goes before we change the rear tires, the followers. Try not to fret, we’ll be fine and remember we survived and thrived in dangerous Mexico. 

Rusty was the perfect chief security officer as always, no trouble at all. Good boy. 

Nice. 

We went back to the campground and parked in the top parking lot, less scenic but easier to get out of. I also checked the radiator and wonderful to report no harm done.  

A nice cool night at 66 degrees and a whole bunch of new friends in Coban. Not such a bad day after all. 

Cave Tubing

We spent the night in a field and it was hot and sticky so we ran our air conditioning off the batteries which was enough to keep us feeling dry if not cold. Our design works! 

A young Mayan girl walked up just before the appointed hour of ten o’clock and said she was Lisa and our guide. She is 14 and has completed free schooling and is working in her family business. 

She lives with her grandmother and two aunts as her parents have remarried and didn’t want her around. She doesn’t see her father any more. I hear this shit and have no idea how to handle it. Her future? You’re looking at it and she’s a bright spark. She speaks Quechua and Spanish and she is a great guide, patient and careful. She can pull her bootstraps as hard as any cliche you like but here she is, for life. 

The walk was about half a mile and the tubing lasted about an hour. The water was occasionally shallow as we are at the end of the dry season but it was a magical experience. 

We saw a few bats and lots of stalactites. Photographing them was tricky as we were lying in an inner tube armed with the flashlight they provided staring at the ceiling sliding by. It felt like flying. 

We twirled merrily around each in our own inner tube. 

It was lovely and cool and our underwater camera (Panasonic TS7) did fine when I got the chance. 

Don’t judge the quality of the cave by the pictures. It was spectacular, a cathedral underground. The blackout section creeped me out but our young guide paddled us through. She was exceptional herding us gently. 

It was a privilege being alone on the trip. Weekends are packed we’re told. 

We paid 60 Quetzals each and gave her a 50Q tip. It’s 7.5 Quetzals to the dollar. The Quetzal is the national bird of Guatemala, a brightly plumed rarely seen bird. Lisa saw one once when she was eight. 

This is the shrimp flower naked because…it looks like one! 

A cacao pod. We saw other plants but -ahem-the battery died. She showed us a monkey ladder, quetzal tails which are actually ferns and a stringy green thing they call Mayan spaghetti which they cook apparently. Lisa wasn’t too enthusiastic about that dish. 

This was where we put in: 

Back at GANNET2 I woke Rusty up and even though he was fine parked in the shade I always worry just a little about him. Silly me. 

Young Bryan gave me a lesson in Quechua which I practiced on passing women. “How’re you doing?” I tried to say brightly. They just giggled. “Dang-Grang-Chuck?” Tee hee was all I got back. It’s a horrible language. The word dog was unpronounceable. It sounds like tsee with a spitting action with your lower lip. I kid you not. No wonder they don’t write it down. Back on the road we went, dodging giant potholes. 

You just dive in and hope for the best…

Lunch was a peculiar cut of pork with rice beans hot sauce and piles of thick soft hot corn tortillas. $3:50 a plate. We chatted with our neighbors who told of their working the power lines, maintaining them in the mountains and getting yelled at by landowners for tromping on their land. “They want reliable electricity but they don’t want to help us” he shrugged. Lovely to be retired! 

Layne found a nature park for the night for $27.  We’re an hour north of Cuban with a swimming pool, a river, showers and trash cans and we are by ourselves. 

The weekend approaches and this place will be a circus. We’ll be gone by the time you read this. 

Up next: a tour of a coffee plantation. Can you stand the anticipation? 

Some random roadside shots. Not all great photography obviously but this is what you see if you drive through Guatemala. Hope they illustrate the actual drive for you.