I had no idea what would come of me posting a meme on Facebook but it let loose a torrent of comment. I don’t post memes. I sent it to an online friend going through tough times at home. It generated no response. I thought about it for a day and that flat affect pushed my mind into asking myself what does this really mean?
I’ve heard it said that people will tell you who they are if you listen. They sure manage to muddle me up. I have terrible judgment where my feelings are concerned. So I started to ask myself, laying here in bed, what is friendship? Friendship is how they treat me? That’s a new one. Which may give you an idea how naive I am.
My scooter wreck brought me close to the face of God. It also brought me face to face with who I am and who I want to be. Flat affect isn’t who I want to be. I know I want joy. The bugger is I don’t know how to find it or share it. To be joyful alone is absurd, the stuff lunatic asylums are filled with all the time. I feel joy at being alive and I now look and see who feels joy with me. If my presence even across the ether doesn’t make you smile then I’m doing something wrong. I don’t want to run you the wrong way or be an annoying permanent smile on your horizon - the smile of insincerity. I want you to show me your joy. And your sadness and your fear.
The only television hero I had failed at it. Anthony Bourdain turned his life around saw my world through his eyes and tripped. I can’t afford to trip on my journey out of rehab. Help me step out of my shell. Help me trust my instincts as you do the same. We can only have a small part of each other but that part should be first rate. I hope this page will continue to be the best I can do and it does something good for you. It’s all I can offer. It has to be enough. If you know me you know I struggle daily with doing my best and I often fail. It’s all in the struggle and like rehab I can’t do it alone. Whether it’s worth the effort I can only say it is for me.
Thanks for reading.
Michael Beattie
AKA Conchscooter
30 comments:
I care, I have enjoyed reading you since my wife and I started going down to Key West years ago. You are my connection, you and Lou. My youngest daughter has ended up in a nursing home so our trips have had to cease. I broke my back and nearly met the maker. They said I wouldn't do bricklaying again but I proved them wrong and had a good career at it. Rehab is tough but very worth it. You will survive it. I would very much like to ride my Harley down to Key West again and meet for lunch sometime but this age thing might have to be 3 wheels.
Hang in and keep posting.
Good luck!
The depth of the thoughts that you share amaze me and I smile at the introspection. It is all good; please keep it up. One the "stages" of life part....IMO number 2 could be replaced with a lot of things. Most people would replace the WTF with "get more stuff." I'll share my number 2. "He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God." Something tells me that that describes your life, your number 2, far more than WTF.
Deep thoughts, Conchscooter. A near miss with meeting your Maker and the loss of one of your heroes by his own hand will do that to a person,precipitate some introspective thinking, that is. You have and continue to cause us to smile and bring a tear occasionally with your daily musings, pictures, thoughts on life, opinions and what each day brings to your world and that's a gift. Some of us have inadvertently stumbled into your life through your blog, and keep coming back for more, look forward to it, expect it, even. We worry when you don't post, for whatever reason, usually a very good one. You give us insight and things to think about that we may not have otherwise. We all have failed at one thing or another many times over no doubt, but that doesn't make us a failure, overall. You're a good person and it's evident that a lot of things bring you joy and you share that joy with us. So don't doubt or second guess yourself. We all do it for a moment or two, but then move on. Your efforts are worth it to those who care about you, and your blog friends do. Keep on keepin' on. It's become part of our daily lives, as well as yours, and we wouldn't have it any other way. KWBound
I, like many others, met you through ConchScooter. I love the thoughts and pictures you post The Keys are a unique place on this planet and you show it to the world. If that were your only purpose, you do a good job at it. BUT, I am sure that the people that you help thru your job think you are an Angle when help arrives. I also think Rusty thinks you are the world. You do a lot of good. Keep it up. DOUG
I have been reading your blog every day for years. I found your blog when I left the Keys many years ago after living aboard my sailboat. At first, I started reading because it kept me connected to the Keys that I love so much, but quickly realized that I very much enjoyed your perspective more than anything. (I admit that my eyes sort of glaze over when you write in detail about the mechanics of your motorcycle and scooter! However, I love and respect your passion!) And I love seeing Rusty and his soulful eyes.
When you wrote about your accident, my heart went out to you and your loved ones. I'm wishing you a full recovery in the quickest way possible.
Please continue to share, your voice is important and is touching people in ways and places that you probably don't realize!
Your fan and friend from a distance,
Lisa
I am surprised u have to say by the passion here.
Taken aback even.
We shall keep on keeping on and keep moto content to a minimum.!
Thank you all for the courage to share.
I found your blog several years ago doing research b4 my first(and so far only) trip to Key West. One of the things that has kept me coming back daily is the wide ranging scope of your musings. Not a scooter person myself, but enjoy a peek into a different culture, so don’t feel u have to cut back on that side of things. The gorgeous pictures and dog love keep us happy, but so do your thoughts on life the universe, and your place in it. Thanks for sharing with us, keep your shaggy old head up, love ya man.
Some people transcend the normal limits of the internet. You’ve made me laugh, cry, cheer, think and marvel. The day your accident pictures first appeared on Instagram, I was crying when my adult daughter stopped by. “Why am I so concerned about someone I’ve never met and probably never will? I don’t even know how to refer to him.” She said, “You call him your friend.” And I do.
For seven years, I’ve checked your blog first thing every morning (even before I get to Webb Chiles) and you’ve brought so much to my life with your pictures, your thoughts, and your heart. I owe you big time, my friend. So if good thoughts and prayers from someone who believes in you will help make you better, you’ve had them all along.
Michael,
You are a force for good. Sometimes we cannot see our own achievements because we are in the process of living them. May I, as a regular reader of your website, simply repeat what you've said: since 2007 some 2 million visits to 4,600 daily pages (of very positive insights and beautiful illustrations.)
Simple arithmetic says that's a raw average of 450 visitors per page but since you've been writing for over a decade, the internet has evolved enormously and I would hazard a guess that your daily readership is currently on the order of several thousand friends. It wouldn't surprise me if it's at least 10,000. Quite an audience, Conchscooter.
I hope you are planning to arrange eventual publication in book format of selections from your daily endeavours. You've got at least four: one on the Keys, one on Cheyenne and Rusty, another on two-wheeled transportation, and one on sailing ...and maybe a fifth topic: conquering rehab.
Wishing you all the very best,
Bill
Yeah, what Lakedog said. Don't cut back on the motor talk! Even those who don't have your passion for riding enjoy your descriptive rides with you (with the exception of that last commute!) and information you share about motor bikes. It's your passion. Keep sharing! ;) KWBound
I'm another one that has been reading from the really early days of your blog and I've loved every post. The posts that show us life in Key West are certainly a huge draw and often leave me longing for a visit to the quieter areas of the Keys.Sadly I'm now more than six hours away so I can't clear my head by driving to Bahia Honda after a 24 hr shift like I used to do.
But when you do the same thing in your walks with Rusty after work I totally get it. And happily tag along with you via posts.
I'm here for the long haul and will happily follow you as you embrace recovery and a life ahead of you wherever your journey takes you!!
Sounds like a good retirement plan ... Michael Beattie, Author, Photographer, Sailor, Lover of Dogs and Riding Enthusiast.
Michael
I'm a very recent addition to the readership of your blog. In fact it was Webb, who led me here.
In two weeks, my 19 year old daughter will be under going a joint replacement on her lower jaw. As you can imagine there is a fair bit of stress and anxiety in our lives at the moment.
The sincerity, sense of humor and the realistic look at the reality of being in the hospital and rehab stay are an inspiration to me and have served to keep me grounded as the date for my daughter's surgery approaches.
Long story short, there are a lot of people who care and whose life you are affecting, in a positive way, by sharing your experiences. For that I sincerely thank you.
Matt
As Camus said, “There is only one really serious philosophical problem, and that is suicide”. In the seeming pointlessness of life, you have to either find a reason to live without ever knowing if it is truly worthwhile or you check out. I, too struggle with all of the doubt but I still like it Here. And I can tell that you do too. Unlike AB, you're not done yet and others aren't done with you so you're just going to have to do what you have to do to get through this trial. Your mind and fingers still work well. They'll be your saving grace ("Tomorrow's come a long, long way to help you...").
I have also been reading your blog for quite a few years. We get to Key West a few times a year but when we are home you keep us connected to our Paradise. Your travels and walks with Rusty gives us our dog fix since we had to put ours down 2 years ago. I think you underestimate how much happiness you give to people and keep them connected to the Keys. I wish you a speedy recovery and all that you are looking for.AB quit on himself and his family.
Special to Matt: you will suffer far more than your daughter. She will be coddled and cherished and will slip under with no memory of what happened. You will be paving up and down knowing nothing and fearing the worst. When I came out of surgery, each time I hallucinated like an imbecile on speed. One time I could only see in high definition black and white. I enjoyed that. Your daughter will need you in recovery. Surgery is a piece of cake by comparison. Pain relief is paramount.
For the rest of you I have no idea what to say. I am overwhelmed.
Michael- you have a gift- of being able to express what many of us feel and cannot always communicate. SO- keep on writing - both for yourself as it fulfils you- and for us, your many readers.
I am a seasonal Key Wester so share your passion of the uniqueness of the the lower keys. The beauty of nature here but even more the acceptance of people from all walks of life.
I am also one of those who have followed you for many years now, finding you after I had a wonderful trip with my husband to the Keys. We miss the wonderful place we love, and during our cold winters in Wisconsin, I cherish your words and pictures. I absolutely love the way you are with Rusty and Cheyenne before him. You are a bit of normalcy to me, on days that our lives are somewhat "crazy". Even if that sounds odd, it's true for me. Thank you for putting your face out there, your opinions out there and your stories. I will continue to pray that you have a great recovery and that we will see you once again, out and about doing the things you love to do. Keep on keeping on !!
Michael - I think you should write a book. You write so beautifully. You really do have a talent! I visit Key West 2-3 times a year, and follow you and Doug Bennett to keep up with what's going on in Key West while I'm not there. I've run into Doug & Teeki a few times, and always look for you and Rusty, but I think you usually walk the streets of Key West waaay early in the morning! Please keep sharing. A lot of people are listening to you.
I found your blog by googling something about key west. The Florida keys have always been a part of my soul. Haven’t been able to visit the Florida keys in quite a few years. Your blog has brought them to my northern home. I feel like you are a friend, even though we have never met. You bring your job, your home, and most importantly your family, into my home and heart. Best wishes to you and your wife, and your remarkable best friend, Rusty. Lots of love, from Michigan.
I am your friend. In a world of fraud and hustle I like to think this corner of the internet is free of both
as long as I have my way. I’ve tripped up a couple of times on that promise but the outline of my life
now is work separated from play separated from commentary. I rarely comment on work here because
my work is sensitive. I can’t write about 911 and police dispatch obviously with imperiling privacy
concerns or police investigations. The rest of my life is play and commentary and uou’re Welcome.
This is what my life in the Keys is. The times I have allowed outsiders to take control of my page I have
lost the joy and simplicity of that message. Never again.
This is your page-a place to relax and laugh at my boring old foibles. A friend called
Key West Diary the Seinfeld of blogs- comfortable as an old sweater where nothing happens.
Lovely. Perfect description.
Love you all. Thanks for reading.
Hi. I share the name Michael with you. Which was my dad's name. He was last of a generation who made me help him with every single project around the house so now I can pretty much can do everything/anything. He built his own house. Took him 2 years of after-work and weekends. He bought materials only as he could afford them. So when he moved into his house it was paid for. That attitude gets me where I am today. Retired, with no debt and a nice little nest egg. I've enjoyed your photographic essays since I found your blog after my impulsive trip to Key West in 2001. I've read your blog almost every day but didn't feel the need to comment but now I find I must. Push forward in Rehab. Don't give up. Tangible Progress. You can do it. Mike from Somerset NJ
Michael
Thank you for your insights about my daughter's surgery. I had not thought of it if from that perspective but you are right. My daughter also has her struggles with anxiety and depression and we have learned to look forward to look to tomorrow because that's where things get better
Cheers and thank you again
Matt
You all are welcome. I enjoy hearing from you. I slightly taken aback by the depth of feeling so I shall double down
Sharing our journey with others makes the road sweeter and hopefully less sorrowful. We never know whats coming except there will be changes and that we will have to adapt to those changes, if only temporarily. Lots of ups and downs, probably stages in those adaptations. Thank goodness you have passions that dont depend on only the physical. It also gives you a chance to develop further your thinking and spirit. And it gives others a chance to respond to you as well.
You are so lucky to have the love of Layne and Rusty and so many folks who call you their friend, followers of your adventures. We esoecially enjoy your bond with Rusty since we so recently have lost each of our Berners to disease. We're making our own transition to being without our furry companions. We were so lucky to have them as long as we did, but its a big loss. Fir the time being we get our dog fix with Rusty and with the other dogs here in our RV park.
You have a challenge with your recovery, but you will get your old life back and be stronger and wiser because of it.
Carry on carrying on Michael
Your blog is our first read of the day
We love the keys and your blog keeps us there every day
My wife always wants to know what conchy is up to !!!!!!
Remember the mundane things in the keys are better than the mundane in 99% of everywhere else
Thanks Michael
Michael you live life on your own terms and face challenges head on with uncommon openness, courage, honesty, tenacity, and extraordinary humour and wit. It is a privilege to know you. The world is in desperate need of many millions more people just like you.
Please by all means carry on just as you are.
Very kind. I’m glad I can help you lot have fun.
Dear Michael I am 71 and just became legally blind.I started reading you after our 1st visit to the White St. Palms Hotel. You are a neat person with a love for your dog, scooters, and food. My husband in Jan. had quadruple bypass , and he'd love to live in Key West. We've visited there 9 times since 05. You say it is too high to live there now, but our town of Conway, SC has been flooded by Florence I surely pray after his retiring after 25 yrs of law enfocement that he can, Your site is fun for us and we had my dad living in Brevard for 19 yrs., hiking the Pisgah Forest trails .that is the best of 2 world except as you say..too many rich ones
have moved in and redid the quaint town. I pray to God. I pray you come out better from this than ever.Patty Taylor
I am reading your accident blog posts and I just wanted to say - your posts do great things for me. Thank you!!!
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