Monday, September 12, 2011

RV The Keys

As shocking as this may sound I have never traveled in an RV,or, more accurately, up until last week I had never previously traveled in an RV; but I have now.

The strangest things happen when your back is turned. I had expected my weekend off to be spent in the usual pursuits, catching up on sleep, watching a Netflix, gardening, organizing the freshly renovated porch.

Instead I discovered my wife and the boys had planned an expedition to the mainland. What about Cheyenne? was my first thought, but Cheyenne did just fine on the tiled hallway (!) floor.

The contraption is 40 feet long with twenty feet of Honda Element and trailer hitch at the back with a camera to monitor it's progress. It's a rig as long as the 18 wheelers I used to drive and I needed months of training to be let loose on the highways as a Teamster.

Not Wayne, he put on his baseball cap, sank into the Lazy Boy that does double duty as a driver's seat and while we cracked some Yuenglings in the back, off we drove. My home and my stationary refrigerator are off to the right of Niles Channel in the picture below.

Actually we did not drink beer as we traveled though I am told in some states, including that where Anheuser Busch is headquartered, beer drinking by RV passengers under way is legal, a sobering thought. 'We encourage responsible drinking' they tell us, but not if it impacts corporate profits. Mind you Key Deer are no obstacle to machinery like this, drunk or sober.

Viszlas like to travel on the bed which sits above the diesel engine and is rather warm for furry Labradors.

My wife sat at the desk and made phone calls to students and their parents about a forthcoming school event, I stood at the front and took pictures of motorcycles while Chuck fiddled with the stereo and told Wayne to watch out for braking drivers ahead.

The dog bar was open behind Chuck's recliner, a testament to the smoothness of the ride across Flatistan.

Onward we went and I was entranced by the height of the views, crossing mangrove woods and later the Seven Mile Bridge.

Zooming down the hill I noticed the cars in front of us kept slowing us down. "Another stereotype shattered," said Chuck after he told Wayne to slow for more brake lights ahead.

Channel Five Bridge looking south before the highway turns east into Matecumbe Key.

So people sigh piteously when faced with a drive up the Keys. Aside from the prospect of Swedish meatballs at IKEA I simply enjoy the drive.

And it's not at all bad in a giant RV. My wife got to pee with out us having to stop which is a big fat positive to a straight man on the move, and even though it felt more like a boat in a seaway than a house while moving it is surprisingly amusing to have all the comforts of home easily to hand while traveling a mile a minute, slow poke cars permitting.

At seven miles to the gallon of diesel it is never going to replace my Bonneville which is, in my mind, still the best way to go. Though Cheyenne might disagree.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad and written at the desk while riding the RV.

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